Our Simple Friend

President Bush spoke to selected representatives from the California Fuel Cell Partnership earlier today, expressing his strong support of the development of a hydrogen car. Touting the ecological advantages of a car that would be pollution free and reduce American dependency on foreign oil, the president vowed to ask Congress for research and development grants in excess of half a million dollars.

"I strongly believe hydrogen is the fuel of the future," Bush told the group. It's in the air, it's in the ground, it's even in our drinking water. Our nation is rich in hydrogen. That's what we're talking about, our simple little friend, the hydrogen atom.". At this point, the speech was briefly interrupted by the whoops and hollers of happy hydrogen scientists. "Good for you guys," said the president, "Good for you."

"Hydrogen is clean, it's mean, it'll run a machine. Hydrogen is domestically produced and hydrogen is the way of the future." The speech was again interrupted by cheers, this time from members of the International Hydrogen Consortium.

"Today I've brought along with me a life-sized model of a hydrogen atom," the president quipped, breaking out the visual aids. "Actually, that's a joke. A real hydrogen atom is a lot smaller than this. But the principle is the same. See that big ball? That's called the middle of the atom, and it's got a negative charge. Sorry. It's got a positive charge. I always get those mixed up. The little ball going around the middle is the one with the negative charge. And that's all there is to a hydrogen atom. It's just exactly like a battery, a positive and a negative, and it's ours for the taking."


2006, Mark Hoback