VO

You know, George, when it's all over and done with, I'm going to be able to stand at those pearly gates and say 'My God, I had one hell of a lot of fun'!

Well, that's what it's all about, isn't it old fella? The Lord gives you life and he expects you to run with it. If you're not havin a good time, you're not playin hard enough.

These past few weeks have been particularly spectacular.

We sure have made our mark in the Middle East, haven't we?

I doubt that they'll be forgetting who we were any time soon, huh? It's chaos out there. Pure unmitigated chaos.

I sure do love me some chaos.

Who doesn't? Did I ever tell you, George, about the time when I was back in college, and I put a cow in the bell tower?

That's nothin, Rummy. When I was in college, I put the bell tower in a cow.

Hee hee hee hee. Hilarity ensued, I'm sure.

You bet your sweet ass. That's what you get when you mix Hillary with Hannity - Hilarity.

Uh huh. Ha.

I guess what's really got me going is that crazy Israel. I mean, there they are, next to Lebanon, a country that doesn't even hate em all that much...

Kind of like Canada is with us.

The Hezbubbas in Lebanon, they hardly ever attack the Israelis, which in my book almost counts as peace.

And then, Israel gets two soldiers picked up... and let's give them the benefit of the doubt and say they were kidnapped...

...and Israel just goes batshit, and starts blowin the entire country to pieces. Kablooie! Kapow! Karamba!

Karamba! That's rich, George. Blowing up their entire infrastructure! Kablooie! Kapow! Karamba!

Doesn't sound as funny when you say it. Anyway, those Lebanese ain't gonna be able to put their country back together for a generation.

If then. But you know what will grow by leaps and bounds? Their hatred of Israel. That's a legacy that will live on.

Yeah, Israel's got themselves a long time problem now. Almost sounds like they took a page out of our playbook, doesn't it?

Kind of. But at least we don't have to live next door to Iraq.

Wah hahahahahaha. Hoo hoo hoo hoo.

Got you with that one.

Yep, you did. You surely did. Say, Rummy, do you think that if we had tried, we could have made any real difference in this mess?

I would say possibly. But I think we have made a difference of sorts by encouraging things, don't you? Does it bother you? I know you kind of thought of Lebanon as your one success in the Middle East...

Yeah... But fuck it.

Did you say buttfuck it?

Wah hahahaha. Damn it, Rummy, you got me again.