"Okay, let's hear it for LeAnn Rimes! Wasn't she great? A real baby doll. Thanks, LeAnn. Okay, I've got a real special treat for everyone right now. I want everybody to give it up for the man who is a universal symbol of peace and tolerance, a shepherd of the faithful and a keeper of the flame for his people, the Dalai Lama! Yeah!... Yeah!... Come on, come on, a hearty round of applause... Yeah!... They love you, big guy! We're all Tibetans today, Dalai!"
"Okay, that's enough applause. You're givin' him more than you gave me. Quiet. This is a man who has won the respect and affection of the American people, as well as people around the world, except maybe for China. I don't think that it would be a stretch to say that he's America's favorite Buddhist. And do you know why that is? It's because he's as cute as a little dickens, that's why. And he's a lot of fun too. Show us one of your magic tricks, Mister Lama."
"Nancy, come on over here and give Mister Lama a hand... Yep, that's it, stand right by his side. Watch this folks, this is going to be great. Okay, he's showing us that his hands are empty, nothin' up his sleeve... Now he's making little wiggly hand motions in front of Nancy's face, and whoa! Look at that! He just pulled the Congressional Gold Medal out of Nancy Pelosi's ear! A big hand folks, a big hand."
©2007, Mark Hoback