Warthog Day


pic from here

The sky was bright and speckless over Lusaka, Zambia this morning as the locals gathered inside of Victoria Park to enjoy the age-old tradition of Warthog Day. While the sun gained heat, the children played stickball or threw rocks into the bushes, and the adults shared warm bottles of Mosi Lager. And then, with a grunt, Mootamba appeared.

"Ha ha, lazy warthog, ha ha, lazy warthog," the chants rang out, sending the irritable beast into an ass-biting frenzy. Young men held out cloaks, matador style, quickly exhausting the old warthog before he had seized the opportunity to munch a single butt. Snorting disgustedly, Mootamba headed back to the underbrush.

Mootamba had seen his shadow. There would be another seven weeks of Democratic primary season.

"I'm really kind of shell shocked," said Senator Barack Obama, already in Scranton. "I was really hoping to have things pretty much wrapped up last night. And then an aide phoned me this morning and told me Mootamba had seen his shadow. What the hell? Mootamba never sees his own shadow. But what can I say? The warthog has spoken."


2008, Mark Hoback