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ding dong Hi
there, I'm Reese Witherspoon, the actress. |
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Actually,
I was looking for Peewee Herman... |
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? |
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Am
I character too? |
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Oh
dear. You think I want to make a movie with you, don't you? Not that I would
mind, Peewee, but... |
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...this
is so much bigger than any movie, even bigger than 'Walk the Line'. This
could effect the fate of the entire world. Do you know the president of the
United States? |
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Well,
I was invited over to his house after I won the Academy Award, and anyway,
don't ask me how, but this Genie shows up... |
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Yes
it was, Peewee. Your old friend. |
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Well,
to make a long story short, he ended up switching minds with the president,
and now he's running the country. He's getting more powerful and arrogant
day by day, and the only way we can fight him is by teaching the president
to use his magic so that he'll be able to do the Jambi mind meld and switch
back again. We know that you spent a lot of time with Jambi, and thought
maybe you could train the president. |
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Oh
my gosh. Please tell me the story. |
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YAY!!! |
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I
feel apprehensive, like something bad is going to happen any minute now. |
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That
is if you can really call that evil floating head a man. I never cared for
Jambi, never thought he added much to the show. Sure, he'd grant me wishes,
but they were all penny-ante stuff - a dish of ice-cream soup or a new horn
for my bicycle. But that night he told me that he had something special for
me. |
I
looked into his eyes and felt myself being sucked up into some unknown
vortex. |
You
know where I ended up. But I vowed I would never resign myself to such a
fate. I practiced my magic constantly, feeling increasingly in control of my
Genie powers. I knew my day would come. |
Meanwhile,
Jambi was enjoying the fruits of my labor. For a while it was all wine,
women, and cocaine. But I knew that he would screw up, Reese. It was
inevitable. Genies always do. |
The
day came when Jambi hit rock bottom. Being me was no longer fun for him. And
thanks to my long months of practice, when he was ready to return to the
box, I had the power to perform the mind meld. |
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Oh
my, what a story. So will you help us Paul? Will you come to Washington and
train our president in the way of the Genie? |
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YAY!!!
But we really need to hurry. |
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Because
if Jambi is ready to switch after he hits rock bottom, we may be just about
out of time. |
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to be continued |
©2006, Mark Hoback