|
|
 ...oh,
lord. you're not saying that you're gonna let me stay in this... that
you're... I'm screwed, aren't I? |
 Now
don't you worry, son, there's a lot of upside to being a Genie. A lot of
upside. And you'll still be here in the Oval Office, right in the thick of
the action. |
 He's
right, George. We want you to be in a position where you can help the
country most. |
 And
right now, that's in the box. |
 Think
about it, George. Now you'll be able to do grant us wishes and do magic
tricks. |
|
I
will? |
|
Sure,
son, at least in theory. |
|
We
don't know the particulars of how Genies operate, but we intend to have
Jambi brief you just as soon as he has an opening on his calendar. |
|
Where
is Jambi, anyway? |
 I
sent him out with Secretary Snow to talk to a bunch of kids that are
visiting. It's our first chance to get an up-close look at how well he can
operate. |
|
Great
Caesar's ghost! He's only been president for a couple of days. Do you think
he's ready? |
|
I
wouldn't worry. Jambi says he's a quick study. Besides, it's just a group of
Future Farmer students. |
meanwhile... |
 ...and
as the most academically accomplished FFA students in this nation's high
schools, I've got to tell you to push yourselves to ever higher goals. You
know, when I was younger, I probably wasn't as motivated as you young people
here today are. In fact, I was only a C student, although I was pretty
active in a lot of extracurricular activities. No, I didn't milk cows, but I
did milk suckers, and here I am today, the President of the United States. |
 Clap
clap clap |
|
Now,
let me ask you a question - how many of you plan to pursue a career in
agriculture? One two three... Let me ask that another way. How many of you
plan to pursue a career in the farm business? Okay, that's quite a few of
you. Looks like this countries vegetables are in good hands. One more
question. How many of you like math? I see. Not a lot of you. Neither did I
when I was your age. Matter of fact, I still don't. You just don't need it
much in day to day life as long as you can keep good help. Remember that
boys and girls, always hire good help. Now let me ask you another
question... |
|
You've
sure got a lot of questions. |
|
That's
important, little missie. A good president needs a lot of questions. Okay
now, who knows how much a trillion is? |
|
No
fair. That's a math question. |
|
You're
right. That is an unfair question, because a trillion is an ummpard...
inponder... number that's too big to even imagine. For example, I was
reading that one trillion seconds is about as long as 1,688 years. |
|
Wow.
That's over a quarter of the length of creation. |
|
That's
correct. And you figured that out by using your math skills. So nine
trillion would be what? |
|
Imponderable.
|
|
What
you said. But I've got a guy with me today that can help you put it all in
perspective. Boys and girls, please welcome the Secretary of Treasury,
Mister John Snow! |
|
clap
clap clap |
 What's
up dawgs! Y'all's the bomb, and I'm here to light the fuse! I've paid my
dues and I won't be recused, when I talk about polishin the president's
shoes. Word up. Y'all got plastic in ya pants, doncha? Cause life be hard
when you don't have a MasterCard. So you know what I'm gettin at, you daddy-os
and pussycats. Big credit good, little credit bad. Let me hear you say yo.
My boss, yeah, the B-man, he's carryin the biggest card on the block, The
American Debt Card, and guess who just got a bump up to nine trill? My boss
president... I mean, my dawg the Georgenator! Let me hear you say YO! |
|
Screw
you. |
 Pardon
me, Secretary Snow, but a response like that is purely unacceptable.
Yeah, you, the little brunette slut, in the second row, with the legs. I'm
talking to you. Don't you try looking at me in awe... You got a problem you
wanna tell everyone about? |
 Yes
I do, you awful man. My name is Debbie Wilson and you're bankrupting my
generation's future. And you've been looking at my legs ever since we got
here. |
|
Earth
to Debbie - I'm a man, a real man, not like your sniveling little farm boys
here. And I've got every right in the world to look at your legs. Maybe
you'd prefer to live in a country where they would... where they would... |
|
Where
they would what? Spit it out, you awful president, you. |
|
Listen
here, young lady... |
|
Listen
here, young lady... |
|
She's
mocking you, sir. |
|
Hey!
Don't you mock me. |
|
Hey!
Don't you mock me. |
|
I've
got a good mind to... |
|
You've
got a good mind to what? |
|
All
right. That's it. Put up your dukes, kid. |
|
back--->
I'm sure he's going to do just fine. |
