Excuses I Haven't Used, Yet

Inertia in my fingertips (I cannot find my Poly-Grip)
My SansaBelt Pants will not zip, and I am late for work.
Take a pill and then another
Then another
Then another.
Shout out to the Holy Mother, I am late for work.

Took a quick look at the news, the Palestinians and Jews,
The president is hiding clues, and I am late for work.
Take a pill and then another
Then another
Then another
Mail quick excuse up to Big Brother, 'Why I'm Late for Work.'

"I was working on my blog, and then I had to walk the dog,
(A special breed - he comes from Prague - that's why I'm late for work)."
Take a pill and then another
Then another
Then another
"Tortured thoughts of Tina Yothers made me late for work."