I beg your pardon, Senator, but that is no way to talk to the Attorney General of the United States. I would like to... Excuse me? Well, Boss doesn't happen to think it's a silly grin. He says I have a very nice smile. And I tend to concur. I'm... I'm quite proud of my smile, my teeth are white and straight and strong, and my upper lip pulls back just like the crust of my mama's Christmas capirotada. Really? You should taste it the way Mama Gonzales makes it, with apples and raisins and sharp cheddar cheese. Magnifico! I'll have my secretary Betty see to it that you get a nice portion for your family.

Now, what was your question again? Why did I say that there had not been a single verified case of civil liberties abuse under the Patriot Act, when there are at least a half dozen documented cases that show I knew that the opposite was true? Ah, Senator, let me be the very first to congratulate you with coming up with such a fine question. A question of that quality surely deserves an answer equally well crafted. No easy matter, Senator, when dealing with someone as masterful as you. And if I may say so, it is more than just your words themselves. It's your style and bearing, the entirety of your presentation. It all adds up to one pretty impressive package.

No, Senator, I don't believe that it's possible that I'm lying. As a theoretical construct I must concede that it exists somewhere within the realm of possibility, but I would be lying to you if I were to say I was lying to you, and that is surely something I would not be prepared to attempt around someone as keenly attuned to nuance as yourself. Say, have you ever met Fred Thompson's wife? Aye carumba!, as the Simpson boy would say - Chaquita banana! Thatza one spicy meatball! How'd you like to get yourself a little piece of that? I would bang that puta five ways to...

Oh... Sorry Senator Feinstein. Very sorry. It's clear that I have completely overstepped my bounds. That's it. I'm shutting up. Not another word out of me.

Mmmm mm? Mmmmmmmm mm mmm mmm.