Presidential Confidentiality Compromised

 

The White House is promising strong and decisive action today after pictures from President Bush's colonoscopy surfaced on numerous websites, both domestically and abroad.

"Whoever leaked these photos will be found, and they will be prosecuted to the full extent of some law or another," said Attorney General Alberto Gonzales in a brief statement early this afternoon.

"We haven't fully narrowed down our list of suspects but at this point, it looks very much like an inside job."

Although the pictures first showed up on 'The Smoking Gun', they have rapidly been reposted on hundreds if not thousands of blogs and web sites. Spokesman Tony Snow, speaking at this morning's press gaggle, let it to be known that any site that "doesn't remove them in the next twenty-four hours could conceivably be charged with giving aid and comfort to the enemy, or at least giving them a hearty chuckle."

Asked how he could be certain that the photos came from the president's rectum, Snow replied angrily "Because that's what the caption said, Helen. Besides, I'd recognize that asshole anywhere."